Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Emailing me

Some commenters have asked for an email address for me. I have set up this address:

The problem with email is that if I send an email to a reader then you will be able to see my IP address which will tell you where I live. So you can email me at that address if you do not want to post a comment on the blog but I will not respond to it. I will only read it. I am sorry.


Anonymous Anonymous said...

you can perhaps respond to emails (which i think would probably be very helpful) by setting up a temporary internet page.
for example, or whatever. there you can post yoru reply, email it to the person. give him/her a day to read it, then take it down.

anyways, anything along those lines would work.

bracha, hatzlacah, and much empathy.

3/30/2005 07:37:00 AM  
Blogger AnotherNYJew said...

Talk to a geek friend to verify this for yourself, but an email from Yahoo or Hotmail will not give you away. An IP address at best could narrow you down to a part of the country. It takes a court order to get an ISP to expose you. If you are on dial-up (is anyone anymore?) your IP changes everytime.

3/30/2005 07:53:00 AM  
Anonymous From Nice Jewish Girl said...

I tested the Yahoo site and it showed the IP address of my computer which I used to send the email through the site. Also an IP address can show your city. I tried it with different addresses from emails I have gotten.

If there is a geek reading this who can tell me an easy way to send email without having my IP address show then please help.

3/30/2005 08:04:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it's past 5am for me, and i just realized the stupidity in what i wrote above.
if i think of anything sensical, i'll let you know.


3/30/2005 08:11:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

(though it would work if the original sender suggested what the site address should be.
e.g. if you can add anything onto, then the sender can write, "email-1234.html", which you can set then set up and write your thoughts etc...
I realize that this is a very backward way of doing things, but it's the best i can think of.)


3/30/2005 08:17:00 AM  
Anonymous yid said...

What do u care if ones knows your country? And NO, one cannot see your little dinky town you live on. Or do you think that with an ip one can see your shoe-size.....

3/30/2005 08:34:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

yid (?),
if you had anything worth saying you could have said it another way.

3/30/2005 09:03:00 AM  
Blogger AnotherNYJew said...

It all depends on your ISP how narrowly your location can be defined. The punchline is ... you have to be comfortable. Just don't send email if you are worried about it. There are more important things in life ... like finding that right guy ...

3/30/2005 09:17:00 AM  
Anonymous Nice Jewish Girl said...

"Yid" for someone who calls himself "Yid" you are a very mean person. I will start deleting comments as soon as I can access Blogger.

3/30/2005 09:51:00 AM  
Anonymous Sigal said...

do you want a gmail account?

If you do, post back on the comments and I'll send you an invite.

3/30/2005 10:44:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

what about using instant messenger or paltalk?

3/30/2005 11:59:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Try; it is completely anonymous.

3/30/2005 12:29:00 PM  
Blogger Texas Mensch said...

Just curious, but would you date someone who was married previously but otherwise fit your expectations?

3/30/2005 01:52:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can hide the IP address very easily. Ask the IT people where you work or I can post the computerese here if you want.

3/30/2005 03:29:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hushmail will hide your ip address and offers free accounts

using a proxy server would allow you to use yahoo mail anonymously but that may involve too much hassle

good luck

3/30/2005 03:52:00 PM  
Anonymous shomer the shomers said...

I am new to this blog and I don't get. You are not married because... You have not found the right one??? YOu are torn over being SN? Are you considering breaking the rules? (That was not a solicitation).

3/30/2005 04:13:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm not sure why i am writing at all. when i first saw this link on jewlicious i thought that's kind of cool but is it a topic worthy of a whole blog?! Well, I just read/skimmed through the whole thing and I think this is great.

i'm a man and married with young kids. orthodox. never was SN. now i am really wondering what to tell my girls.

also, you think about sex like men think about sex -- i mean: all the time. that was an insight for me.

i'll keep reading and post again when i have something more intelligent to add.


3/30/2005 05:15:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, I just thought Yid was joking around. But that's more about the differences between men and women.

Also, he's wrong. you may not be able to tell city, but certainly you can narrow it down. And unless that city is NY, it's quite possible that another resident of the same Orthodox community could figure out who she is.

3/30/2005 09:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, perhaps not "joking around" -- because he meant it -- but "being flippant." Meaning, I don't think he meant it nearly as harshly as the ladies took it.

3/30/2005 09:12:00 PM  
Anonymous ck said...

Yow. So complicated! Here's a simple solution for sending anonymous mail. Go to this link. Use the "send to a friend functionality of the site to send anonymous email to anyone. The IP address will be a server in Sweden.It totally works. I send all my death threats from there, and have yet to be arrested. :)

Kidding. So... are you engaged yet? The discussion about your blog over at Jewlicious is furious and contentious. SHould you wish to weigh in you can send me an email to Use that secret email method and I will gladly post it on the site. Some people think you are oppressed by your faith others think you're the next best thing since Joan of Arc. Uh... if Joan of Arc was Jewish. Or something.

Rock on NJG!

3/30/2005 09:42:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"also, you think about sex like men think about sex -- i mean: all the time. that was an insight for me."

what is WITH all the men saying this? I'm a woman, I thought about sex all the time before I was married, I think about it about as much now too though maybe its a bit less urgent some of the time.

You guys are so brainwashed.

3/31/2005 12:11:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

does gmail hide ip addresses??

3/31/2005 12:11:00 AM  
Anonymous M'barr said...

As a techie, I just went ahead and checked. Gmail is clean - they show a Recieved: line from HTTP, but it only shows the Gmail server it came from, then it moves to SMTP, and on to the destination. Yahoo actually shows the IP of the sender when they sent that message.

However, I'd recommend you check for yourself. I have gmails invites, and I just sent you one. You clearly are able to tell what your IP currently is. Accept the invite, send an email to yourself ( at another account). Check the full headers.

I also just verified that when gmail tells me you accepted the invite, and the new account name, that it will *not* tell me any IP's or info about you, other than the gmail account name you choose.

Now.. if anyone wanted to go hunting me down.. they'd have a much easier time. Oh well. That's the practical advise. As to dating.. Don't ask me. There's a reason I live in NYC. I'm also male, which helps.. but we get the pleasure of working up the nerve to ask the girls out.

A note on another comment- JTS Rab students- probably not for you- many of them aren't shomer shabbos these days, and almost none are non-egal. There is a growing liberal modern orthodox community, growing around groups like Edah, and Yeshivat Chovevi Torah. At least some of us don't claim to be strictyly SN, but are shomer shabbos & kashrut.

Also... You may want to explore the roots of SN. In the form it's practised now, it's not a very old custom. I'm not a rabbi, nor do I play one on TV.. however, look back 50 years to the Young Israel movement, which had mixed dances, or other similar events..

None of this really has anything to do w/ sex though. Hugging & kissing *may* be ok on some level, but serious sexual contact is probably out. I really do mean "may". It all comes down to your Rabbi, in the end.

3/31/2005 02:29:00 AM  
Anonymous josh said...

Just to play the part of a quasi techie second opinion, since its a valid concern and the topic a sensitive enough one to fully understand your desire for anonymity. I just checked on gmail, hotmail, yahoo and hushmail... Gmail and Hushmail seem to both avoid putting your IP address anywhere on the emails, but I'd offer the cautionary reminder that Gmail is still in Beta, and subject to change without notice. That said, its far easier to use than hushmail, and I can't see Google changing a security feature like that. Still, worth mentioning. Luck with it.

3/31/2005 03:04:00 AM  
Anonymous ck said...

Yo techies - how come y'all never considered my ubber simple solution to anonymous email? no need to open a new account.

3/31/2005 04:43:00 AM  
Anonymous M'barr said...

I looked, but in this case, figured that a long term option was probably better than having to copy & paste addresses and everything.

This would work, yet it'll be a pain everytime... I just tried it, but it looks like the site is poorly configured. That kind of option is generally considered an unsafe weapon in the hands of spammers. It's effectivly an open relay, since you can just code a program to abuse it. You have to be very careful with a suggest a XYZ to a friend programs.

(Oh- the antispam folks tend to blacklist any site that has such things, after they're discovered by the spammers. I wouldn't guess it'll last very long, or if it does, that your recipient will always get it.

There is always something to be said about user interfaces.. and gmail has one of the best at this point. if it's anon, then you're good.

Note: This advise is probably worth exactly what you paid for it. Trust, but verify. If you don't know how to check the headers on something, ask, and someone will explain it, and others can make sure I don't miss anything. I doubt I missed anything.. but it's not my anonyminity.

3/31/2005 05:26:00 AM  
Anonymous Yid said...

Please do forgive me. I am sorry, I didn't mean it in that way.

Good luck in everything you do, I have you in my prayers.

3/31/2005 05:58:00 AM  
Anonymous SomeJew said...

DO NOT SEND EMAIL, I know for a fact that nearly* every email cam be traced, I am going through a spoofing faze with a bunch of my accounts, and tracking the spoofers have been easy.

*nearly (there is always something)

8/25/2005 02:54:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said... will not send your IP addy out and has several domains to choose from.

11/01/2005 03:27:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the Girl who is so confused and hurt inside,

I am so sorry for I can feel your pain. The beauty of Taharas Hamishpacha is unclear to you because you have no idea what it is like to be used, abused and have someone be bored of you. Hashem created the world just for you. The relationship between you and G-d is far more deep than conceived. First, when Adam and Chava were created, Hashem ripped a rib from Adam and created Chava. So therefore, we are only 50% without our mate. And that is why you feel this way. Empty, alone, and unfulfilled. When a person gets married, than that person will be complete. The family purity laws, the separation is the means to be together in its most ultimate state. In order to have that honeymoon every month and have your husband wait for you is incredible. I wish I could give over to you the importance of it all. The intertwined bodies make one with kodesh only when it is the right time. If not than the beauty becomes unattractive. A husband will come to laothe his wife if not for these laws. And, unfortuneately when this happens, he looks outside the marriage for the excitement that he is missing within. These laws are chokim. We are not to understand all of Hashem's ways, but you must understand that without these laws our marriages are very shallow. You must contact a orthodox rebetzin and learn all the hasgafas in order to understand. I wish for you to find you besherit and don't expect him to be perfect because he won't be. When you find something you don't like, work on yourself and make it work.

7/06/2006 12:26:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just go where others are looking for the same things. Don't hang around negative groups.

1/19/2008 04:03:00 AM  

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